Oh my Darlin, oh my Darlin
Jan 11/15. His room is ready, we have been moving things in for days. He always liked nice things, lots of decor and I have filled his room with things i think he will love, things to make him comfortable. He is there almost every day, a drop in for coffee, a little visit. The staff is great, warm, caring. Everything is ready. He goes in tomorrow. Part of me is relieved/anxious to start a life without having to ensure his every need taken care of, looking forward to cleaning my house and getting organized, and part of me just can’t think that he will never sing in the bathroom again Oh My Darrrrlin Clementine.... never sit and talk to his Pretty Willow, never sit at this table again. I can't visualize it. And I can't say never. I don't know what things will look like a week or two, or a month or two from now. But I am not ready to write him out of this part of my life just yet. And so tomorrow I will treat it like the respite breaks I have had before. That will be easy, that will be good, just a long respite. That I can do. Because anything else will just break my heart.